D. G.

At times I think of him- and wonder if we shall ever meet again. Surely we must? Surely, surely, for no world could be this cruel to keep us apart. No life this torn, and love lost. Surely I shall see him again, surely.

She will not care- none of them will. I do not know why I try any longer in this bleak struggle. I have not touched the room that houses my portrait since he left with the key; that is my promise to him, at least, at least. I will not die, not to-day, not when there is still hope of his return.

And I know he must miss me. Surely! Why would he not?- He left for me. I wait for him as I have never waited before. I do not know what has gripped me now- why I feel such lingering passions now! Why never before I have thought to want someone with all my heart and soul so much that even when I am freed from their grasp I want to go back to it. I want to marry him. He is the right one, I know it. I'm waiting, waiting to marry him. I love him so deeply.

I am enamoured of you. Accursed! How I hate it.

I dream feverishly of you saving me from myself.

I dream of your lips, your soul, your hand- your kindly hand. I dream of how you would hold me. How eager you were to dispel all my fears, to soothe my shaking forehead. I dream of your love, a warm thing around me- oh, my love, my love! Why do you not come back to me? I know why. It is all foolish. I love you so deeply my heart would ache- it does, it does.

How you healed me. How you were my saviour. And now there is nothing but dust.

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I love you.

Why did you forsake me? I think every day of you. You have vanished as easily as a drop of light. I'll wait for you - every day I shall until we are again together.

I keep your ring on my finger. I will keep it there for as long as I dare. Then, one day, you will believe my faith to you.

I am sorry for all this. Please forgive me, please forgive me.